NSA

NSA The NSA - We listen! Est. 1952. If you are naturally paranoid or easily offended, leave now. Remember that Christmas song? We are the NSA. We are everywhere.

"He knows if you've been sleeping, he knows when you're awake? He knows if you've been bad or good?" Santa is one of us. Always listening, always watching. We like to refer to our unofficial motto: "If it's private, we'd like to know why."

07/12/2021

The best is yet to come.

Ha, take that HUAWEI. It's not that you're spying on us, its because you prevent us from spying on YOU!
09/13/2019

Ha, take that HUAWEI. It's not that you're spying on us, its because you prevent us from spying on YOU!

We up in here bitchslapping our employees.

S/O to our customer services in India.
07/31/2018

S/O to our customer services in India.

We up in here bitchslapping our employees.
05/14/2018

We up in here bitchslapping our employees.

STOP IT, YOU’RE HURTING US
12/21/2017

STOP IT, YOU’RE HURTING US

~Calypso

08/18/2017

On Monday, August 21st, the United States will experience a Total Eclipse of the sun. Here are some helpful tips, for the best eclipse viewing experience:

The people of Tennessee may have the best view, but will also be the first to be sacrificed.

Animals may behave strangely. If your dog speaks like a man, heed its dire warnings.

Don't trust the squirrel with a child's face. It speaks only lies.

When your double arrives, resist the inclination to fight it. It may be stronger than you. Chances are, it will disappear after the eclipse. Be careful it doesn't switch places, it will be a few decades before you get the chance to come back.

If you stare into the void, and it blinks first, you win. But the prize is insanity.

Werewolves are not only impossible to kill during an eclipse, they become SUPER werewolves.

Whatever you do, Don't buy any weird plants. We don't want a repeat of last time.

Apophis, the Moon Serpent may try to eat you. Let him.

Remember, no matter how salty your GBF is, the moon still throws the best

If once upon a time you were falling in love, but now you're only falling apart, there's nothing you can do. This is a different kind of eclipse.

Police brutality in perspective.
02/13/2017

Police brutality in perspective.

02/10/2017
People are contacting us a lot about 'minding our own'. Sadly we can not change most of Capitol's decisions. We do have ...
10/11/2016

People are contacting us a lot about 'minding our own'. Sadly we can not change most of Capitol's decisions. We do have some clever interns with mad painting skills and some damage control suggestions. Interns will be interns, next time you paint a jet Russian, don't forget the primer. Morons.

Pop quiz anyone?
08/08/2016

Pop quiz anyone?

*cough*
07/12/2016

*cough*

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Meteor Crater
Winslow, AZ
86047

Telephone

+18009488488

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