09/01/2014
A SAD FAREWELL TO BOBBY: Hi Everyone,
As with any group of people there are those who stand out due to the type of person they are, the magnetism of their personality. Bobby was this kind of person. About a month ago Bobby lost his year long battle with cancer. I would like to tell you something about the kind of a man he was, or more accurately, the man he had became and pay tribute to my friend.
Bobby was one of the first homeless people I met. From spending time with him almost every weekend for a few years I think it's safe to say he is one who could have easily made the choice between being homeless or not. It was quite apparent he had the ability and intelligence to live as most of the rest of us do, as he had done before serving our country. He simply didn't have the desire to live this way. He chose homelessness. This doesn't mean he chose to be miserable. All outward appearances said he wasn't, and he often stated this in so many words by explaining in detail his delight having so few responsibilities. Having little responsibility was very important to him and seemed to be connected to his sensation of freedom.
Robert (one of Bobby's long time campmates and who shares the same name) and I discussed this about Bobby. We both think that his time in Viet Nam had something to do with this desire to feel free, and, why Bobby chose homelessness. Something happened to him over there. Generally speaking, it's not difficult to imagine what. What happened to Bobby specifically, what it was that made him see life so differently once he was home again, we'll never know for sure. He never talked about it with anyone, always avoiding the subject when it came up. Bobby was probably a classic case Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
For Bobby the worst part of being homeless was flying a sign in front of the In and Out Burger in order to acquire his daily sustenance. He hated flying a sign, it was demeaning, and he had gotten to the point he could hardly look and another burger from people giving him so many of them. He only stayed out there as long as he had to, eagerly returning to camp to read and be with his campmates once he had what he needed. This usually only took and hour or two on a good day.
Talk about a voracious reader, Bobby did little else. He was quite content sipping his beer and reading a book in his shady camp when the weather was mild. During summer he could be found most any business day at the Thousand Palms Library. He read whatever he thought would be interesting or informative, newspapers, novels, true stories, he was always surrounded by reading material. We often exchanged books.
Bobby was undoubtedly the head of the homeless camp he shared with others. Although this isn't a position he realized by self appointment or through democratic process. It was a natural position for him considering this alluring magnetism he possessed, intelligence and congenial disposition. Everyone liked and respected him and gravitated toward him. Not only did his campmates enjoy his company, but others also did who helped homeless people in one way or another like church groups and county workers. I met and talked with some of these people and they spoke highly of Bobby and easily remembered him.
For me, spending time with Bobby was something I always looked forward to. It's difficult to explain this time with him in the Tamarisk grove where his somewhat hidden, cozy camp was in Thousand Palms. It was like time stopped and worries seemed to drift away. It felt like unintentionally and temporarily being overcome by his desire not to have responsibility and experiencing the happiness he felt from this with him. It was a time just to be --living for the moment and feeling very much okay with this.
Chris
