Space Cadet Schmuckatelli

09/05/2021

I’ll tell you what…. this is SO much easier on the knees when there’s not much gravity.

09/04/2021

No Guardian has ever lost their space blaster in the history of the Space Force.

👀

09/04/2021

For the record, the Space Force didn’t leave a single piece of equipment in Afghanistan. 😎

Mostly because we were never there. But, uh… I’m pretty sure Biden would have left us all there if we were.

09/03/2021

Shout out to an awesome leader.

We aren't allowed to have balls in the Space Force. They told me it would weigh us down in zero gravity.

09/03/2021

Hey sorry for the long silence. I was...... deployed. To uh..... Crater 1437. It's on the dark side of the moon.

You probably haven't heard of it.

But yeah. I'm back.

09/03/2021

Feeling slightly under represented here.....

01/12/2021

Guys.

We don’t have the personnel to manage a HALO-jump into the Capital to fix the s**t going on right now.

All we have is a guy named Steve who says he used to “do this kind of stuff” when he was growing up in Tennessee.

Can we postpone the overthrow until after we have enough Guardians to, you know.... guard s**t?

Thanks.

12/29/2020

In the words of the great Barney Stinson, “SUIT UP!”

12/19/2020

We are the Guardians of the Galaxy.

Fun fact, SSgt hates being called StarLord.
What a bitch.

12/14/2020

CIF still fu***ng over people all the way up in Boba Fett's timeline.

05/11/2020

Question: do you take overweight and out of shape prior service Marines?

The Official Website for the United States Space Force

05/11/2020

Be all you can be, out of this world.

Or some s**t like that. I dunno.

A range of positions appear to be available.