CRAB - Critical Research of Anomalous Bodies

CRAB - Critical Research of Anomalous Bodies The Maryland branch of anomalous being/object research and containment. Our employees make up the finest assortment of agents this side of the Chesapeake Bay.

We also have a café and giftshop on the premises. Come for the anomalies, stay for the coffee!

We finally have an answer to the missing shoe crisis that befell Ocean City. One of our contained Chartreuse level anoma...
12/08/2021

We finally have an answer to the missing shoe crisis that befell Ocean City. One of our contained Chartreuse level anomalies escaped over the summer and has built a nest. It is back in containment, but the shoes are no longer worth wearing anymore due to being covered in benign slime. After it is booked in again, we'll share it's picture. Since there is a nest, we assume there are more of them. Any other sightings of shoe-nests should be reported directly to the tip-line.

Come try Jim's latest attempt at human cuisine! The first floor went crazy over the almost-orange flavor. Each one conta...
12/07/2021

Come try Jim's latest attempt at human cuisine! The first floor went crazy over the almost-orange flavor. Each one contains 1400 calories and 1.6g of vitamin c. Available now for a limited time in the cafe's cold case.

One of our agents received the following information regarding an anomaly at large. Due to being out of work and hiding ...
12/06/2021

One of our agents received the following information regarding an anomaly at large. Due to being out of work and hiding places, the sentient lawn mower is starting to migrate further south for the winter. Last seen at the Lexington Market stop on the Baltimore Metro. If you have anymore information, please contact us.

Pocomoke River:Level - CarnelianDetails:This river claims to be a goddess. Should you hear a women's voice in the halls ...
12/06/2021

Pocomoke River:
Level - Carnelian

Details:
This river claims to be a goddess. Should you hear a women's voice in the halls with no other anomalies around, rest assured. While she does not seem to be malicious, she has claimed several 'plagues' in the past as her doing (most recently noted in the 1990's).

The Pocomoke allows us to house our facility on her 'sacred grounds'. In return, a 'shrine' was erected on the roof level of the building. Researchers are unable to contain her, but she is willing to cooperate with our studies in exchange for 'valuable spices'. There are emergency spices on each level near the fire extinguishers should you feel threatened by her presence.

The Director will not be available for the rest of the month. They have begun their vacation in the nbslqəqomu dimension...
12/06/2021

The Director will not be available for the rest of the month. They have begun their vacation in the nbslqəqomu dimension for the holidays. Forward all questions and concerns to the head of HR for the time being. They will return on January 1st.

In the meantime, all agents are encouraged to show their holiday pride by wearing holiday themed ties for the rest of the month! There will be a prize given at the end of the month for the most spirited tie. Please respond below with a picture of your tie.

REMINDER: All spectral beings are only permitted to wear their mandatory CRAB issued uniforms. The image below has Jim m...
12/05/2021

REMINDER: All spectral beings are only permitted to wear their mandatory CRAB issued uniforms. The image below has Jim modeling his. If there are any questions, please schedule a meeting with the Director.

This update is being posted due to one or more of our contained specimens removing their uniforms and occupying the 2nd floor restrooms for extended periods of time. This behavior is unacceptable.

12/05/2021

Welcome to CRAB. We are here to serve our community, either by containing anomalous phenomena or making the best cup of joe around. Please feel free to stop in the giftshop on your way out and purchase a mug or t-shirt.

Address

Pocomoke City, MD

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when CRAB - Critical Research of Anomalous Bodies posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share

Category