Quote of the Day

Quote of the Day "The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit."
-- Somerset Maugham

06/20/2012

"People who speak in metaphors can lick my crotch."
Jack Nicholson

02/12/2012

"Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races." - Homer Simpson

02/12/2012

"Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined."
-- Samuel Goldwyn

02/09/2012

"On a long enough timeline the survival rate for everybody drops to zero." ~ Tyler Durden

02/05/2012

Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy s**t we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our great war is a spiritual war. Our great depression is our lives. ~ Tyler Durden

01/30/2012

"I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally."
-- W.C. Fields

01/29/2012

"I can resist everything except temptation."
-- Oscar Wilde

01/28/2012

"A girl's legs are her best friends, but the best of friends must part."
-- Redd Foxx (from Comedy Album - Huffin and Puffin)

01/27/2012

"The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts."
-- Conan O'Brien

01/24/2012

"The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty."
-- Woody Allen (Crimes and Misdemeanors, 1989)

01/23/2012

"I’ve never been to an Al-Qaeda Christmas party, but I have seen the invites. No music, no dancing, but we promise the fastest game of pass the parcel you’ve ever seen."
-- Omid Djalili

01/22/2012

"The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts."
-- Conan OBrien

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