Magenu.org

04/03/2025

01/23/2025

This is a message I received from my daughter, who is now 18 and studying abroad.

The emotion I felt while reading it was incredibly powerful, and I wanted to share it.
My husband and I decided not to allow our children to have social media until at least the age of 16. I know many of you face this same challenge, and kids can be really persuasive, or perhaps you just feel like it’s a battle you can’t win anymore. But here’s why it’s so important to stand your ground and use every resource at your disposal: children are not ready for the constant comparisons, self-doubt, violent imagery, toxic beauty standards, dangerous trends, and online predators.

The research is clear—early access to social media has been harmful to this generation. Anxiety, depression, self-harm, eating disorders, and su***de rates have all increased. There are countless studies to back this up, yet we still worry about our kids missing out and often feel torn.

But here’s the reality: once you give them access, that fear of missing out (FOMO) increases exponentially. No one will look back and wish they had started social media earlier. We have to support each other in knowing that saying “not yet” is the right choice. Trust your instincts. You’re doing the right thing.
Communicate with your kids, show them the research, and explain why you’re holding off. They won’t be happy, but you can get through it.
Learn to tolerate their emotions and show empathy. I often told my daughter, “I’m so sorry. I have no idea what it’s like for you because I didn’t grow up with this, so I really feel for you. I’m here to listen, to talk, to vent, or even if you’re angry. But my job is to keep you safe, and this is one of the ways I’m doing that.”

It’s tough—I won’t deny that. We went through some really intense, tough moments over this. But ultimately, we came out the other side, and her message proves that it’s possible. Hang in there, parents!
You’ve got this!💪

01/16/2025

We often fear talking about CSA. We worry we might overreact, or that it’s such a heavy subject that we might not approach it the right way. We fear being seen as the problem, or we believe that CSA doesn’t affect boys, so it’s not something we need to worry about. We convince ourselves that CSA happens to other families, not ours, or that our community is safe, so it doesn’t concern us. We think that if we just stay calm, we can avoid the anxiety. We might feel that because we watch our kids closely, they’re safe. We believe that if something were wrong, our child would tell us.

But CSA thrives in silence. When we avoid talking about it, we unintentionally silence our children, too. By speaking up, we can help prevent another child from experiencing it. Yes, it’s uncomfortable, but choosing silence allows more children to suffer. We often tell our children to come to us if they are ever hurt, but as adults, we struggle most with discussing the reality of CSA. Our children need more from us—they need us to talk about it openly.

We must practice prevention every day, not just when something feels off. Denying that CSA exists only makes it easier for offenders to harm children. Abusers are all around us, and our silence makes it easier for them to continue. If we want our children to feel safe coming to us about abuse, we need to talk about CSA in real terms. We need to educate ourselves about prevention, trust our instincts, intervene when something feels wrong, and call out myths or harmful jokes about CSA, r**e, in**st, or victims.

Be the adult your child needs. We can protect children by showing them they can always speak up and by shining a light on places where darkness prevails. Please, our children can’t afford our silence—it hurts too much.

12/26/2024

This is a true story for too many kids. ➡️Did you know Most sexual abuse happens in the homes of the offender or the victim ?

➡️Did you know that 90% of sexual abuse happens at the hands of someone the child knows very well and most are victimized by family members ?

➡️Did you know that offenders look for availability and vulnerability?

➡️Did you know that offenders can be uncles, cousins, parents, aunts, grandparents and other close relatives?

➡️Did you know that 1/3 of the cases are perpetrated by children and adolescents ?

🎯Did you know there is a lot you can do to minimize risk and prioritize safety ?

🧑‍🧑‍🧒‍🧒 Review the body safety rules with your kids before any family get together. Remind them that they can always come tell you if they are uncomfortable or if someone breaks a body safety rule.

🏠 Supervise- know where your kids are and check on them. Don’t assume everything is ok because it’s “just family”

🚪Don’t allow playing behind closed doors. Open door policy at all times

📵 Older kids shouldn’t be hanging out with younger kids. Different interests, different behaviors. If kids have devices pay extra attention. Are they filtered? Are they introducing content to your kids? If you can make a no device rule at gatherings, that would be best.

🛏️ If you are sleeping in a house with other family members be aware of the arrangements. Your children should be near you.

🫂Use opportunities to practice consent, boundaries and trusting your gut feeling. Don’t force your child to show affection to a family member. As the adult model that with other kids too such as with your nieces and nephews. Ask permission before offering a hug or kiss and accept the no if given.

💪Don’t be bullied by other adults calling you “overprotective”. Trust your gut and step in it you feel that something doesn’t feel right.

📢Conversation and education is the number one way to create safe environments for kids. You can’t control everything and you can’t stop all bad things from happening but, we can make it much safer for all our kids.

Happy Chanukah. 🕎✡️

07/21/2024

Last week I attended the 9th Annual International Chabad chinuch convention for teachers. I gave 2 workshops on boundaries and teachers on the front line of prevention. I met some incredible women and had an absolutely beautiful experience. I also learned a ton and here are my takeaways:
•There are so many humans who just want to learn how to be better at what they do and show up for kids in their care in the best way possible.
•CSA prevention is getting easier for many to talk about and still a struggle for many as well.
•Everyone has a story that’s important and valuable
•I meet CSA survivors everywhere I go
•Child on child abuse is a topic we need to keep talking about
•Being kind and open should never take precedence over protecting our children
•We all still have a lot of work to do.
•I’m so glad humans like those I met exist.

05/21/2024

Learn everything you need to know on how to prepare your kids and protect them from Child s3xual abuse while away.

05/07/2024

I often think about the work I do and how difficult it feels to protect children. It shouldn’t be so difficult but, it somehow is. That’s why I feel like I need a never ending shield to protect them all. One that’s strong and fierce and can repel anything harmful. When my own children ask me why do you need to know where I’m going or who I am with or what I am doing I tell them that having children is an amazing experience. It’s the best thing I will ever do in my lifetime. And it’s painful. It’s like having my heart walk around outside of my body without my control. It makes me think of all the adults who see children as needing to be protected and nurtured. Our new logo speaks to me from this place, a shield of strength and protection and a heart of love and compassion. Children are our gifts, our hearts and we are obligated to protect them.

05/01/2024

🚨Last Chance!🚨Amazing workshop tomorrow! Learn how to protect your children and understand how perpetrators target kids and families. Learn what we need to protect our kids. Sign up now at MagenU.org/Workshops DON’T MISS OUT!

04/19/2024

🚨Educate, Empower, Protect🚨Save your spot at this incredible workshop. Sign up now! www.MagenU.org/Workshops