Conservative Party Dreadquarters

29/01/2022

The moral fibre of the Honourable Member for Middlesbrough South on full display.

11/01/2022

A defiant Dehenna defecates on Daily defection doggerel. CPDQ asserts that ideological consistency is an essential trait in politics, so it fluffs the spirit such to see Ms. Davison reaffirm her commitment to systemic corruption, the erosion of environmental standards and the petty desolation of the poor.

23/11/2021

03/11/2021

02/05/2021

Budding Police & Crime Commissioner Steve Turner brexhibits the objective temperate that makes him the natural choice for any position of high authority.

02/05/2021

Known for his fiercely independent spirit, Steve Turner (the Conservative candidate for Cleveland PCC) is not afraid to trump-et support for alternative views; here he seeps amidst far right groups and validates the online diarrhoea of Pat Condell, a bigoted COVID-19 conspiracy theorist.

22/03/2021

Mr. Anderson is right – extreme left wing organisations like the British government must not be allowed to continue their abhorrent whitewashing of this nation's great history.

17/03/2021

At an embryonic 28 annuses, Redcar's Jacob Young MP is one parliament’s most foetal urchins. He was born on 2nd February, 1993 – the Year of the Spineless Ferret.

05/03/2021

A tiring opponent of misinformation in British politics, Bishop Auckland's Dehenna Davison casts a critical cross-eye over Sir Keir Starmer's response to hokey cokey hophead Rishi Sunak's latest budget:

28/02/2021

Ill-Health Secretary Matt Hancock embraces memeology in order to summarise the government's COVID objectives.

06/02/2021

HARD FLEXIT

A brawn again Boris Johnson dibulges the fruition of his post-recovery brexcercise regime.

23/01/2021

MANGA MANAGEMENT

Downing Street is set to unveil a promotional arc of Nippon-inspired comics as part of a tsundaring smarm offensive designed to weeaboost UK-JP trade by arming the Prime Minister with another witless prop to joggle moistly at a suicidal we**am while our thrice-maimed economy tube-surfs the u-bend. The entitled series, produced by the 4kids Licensing Corporation, will emphasise the cherry blossoming ties between East and West by erasing all references to Japanese culture in a street-trotting escapade joestarring the heroic Boorish Johntsar and his supernatural sidekick, Daydream BeLeaver - an invisible psychic ghost.

Following the attainment of a telescopic ladder, Simon Clarke MP was approached for comment:

“Ever since my freakishly distended childhood, I have been an avid observer of Japanimation and minga pamphlets, pearl-harbouring many found memories of Sonny Deku and his busy adventure to collect the seven dragging balls in order to become King of the Ninjas,” yelled the brown-nosing lothario, crunching his Michelinian gut pork into a triple-bent propulsion justsu, arms rearward stiff to throttle wind resistance. “His jolly quest has certainly made me kumay...keemuh...kameha-ha-ha on several occasions.”

Summon a sample PDF of the government’s consequential artlessness efforts by clicking the link below:

https://docdro.id/0s57l8J

BoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. Hamon Wryyy LTD. HMG 21. © Hamon Wryyy ltd. 060845. (RRP $8:00). Shonen Chump. Tall Story & Art by Willie Johnson 215192. 0142113. Part 80: Golden Windbag. [Stand name]. Daydream BeLeaver [Stand Master]. de. U-Tu rni tu. e Int. E. Honesty. From Me to You. Com p. E. E. [S...