We offer Family Mediation in Stafford, Crewe, Cannock, Stoke, Burton & Telford
What is Mediation? SEPARATION and/or DIVORCE
Separation of adults (with or without divorce proceedings) often leaves people with issues and arguments that they cannot resolve themselves. What is to happen about the children, about the house, about money? At such a low and stressful time in your life, you may be tempte
d by what has been the traditional approach: a legal battle, probably ending in court, turning you and your ex partner into antagonists with opposed interests. This process often proves very costly in both money and emotion. MEDIATION – A BETTER WAY FORWARD
Mediation offers most people a better way of resolving difficult disputes. Sitting down together with an experienced mediator, over one, two or several sessions, offers a high chance of resolving your issues much more cheaply, quickly, and with less harm to future relationships as parents. Mediators can give you information about separation and divorce processes, and make suggestions to you as to what might be helpful to each of you. It will remain helpful and important to receive individual advice from a solicitor. Because courts recognise that mediation is a more positive option, anyone thinking of applying to court is now asked if they have first considered mediation. (This is done by attending a short meeting with a mediator: known as a MIAM, this is a Mediation and Information Assessment Meeting.) Public funding, if you qualify for it, is available to pay for mediation; otherwise there is a charge, but it is likely you will overall pay considerably less than if you each engaged lawyers to negotiate on your behalf. Mediation itself always remains voluntary – either or both of you can end it at any time. Nothing in mediation can bind you. You set the agenda. Everything said is confidential (apart from any concerns about risk to children or adults, and any evidence of fraud). Nobody can use what has been said in mediation in any court proceedings, so people can feel freer to discuss options. You will be asked to make full disclosures about money and property (if that is what you wish to discuss). For some people it will be too difficult, at least for a while, to sit in the same room with their ex partner. "Shuttled" mediation remains an option here, where people are seen separately, while in the same building. There are also a few people for whom mediation will not be suitable: where there is a history of violent behaviour, or intimidation, or severe doubts about the disclosure of property. Assessing suitability is an important part of the MIAM (referred to above). For both you and the mediator it is a chance to think about whether mediation is the right process. For the majority of people, we very much believe that it is. In past years our figures show that we have assisted people to resolve their issues in 80% of cases. THE CHILDREN
Thinking about arrangements for your children is often an important part of mediation. If both of you think it might help, your child or children can to be invited to talk confidentially with a specially trained mediator. This is entirely voluntary on their behalf and, with your permission, the mediator will write to them personally to explain that. She and the children will agree upon what they would like to be fed back to you as parents. This gives the children 'a voice' in a situation where they may be feeling 'invisible', upset or confused - or where divided loyalties could become a problem. MEDIATION – THE END PRODUCT
If the discussions in mediation result in proposals acceptable to both sides, the mediator will write these up and the document should then be shared with a solicitor; the proposals may then, with the consent of both sides, be turned into the form of an order, which can be made binding. Public funding is available to pay for legal help and support alongside mediation.
