The Not So Secret Foster Carer

The Not So Secret Foster Carer Therapeutic foster carer and fostering ambassador. Raising awareness of the true professional role of the modern therapeutic foster carer.

A memory popped up on my FB business page, Radiant Retro Rides I think it's a reminder that, no matter what the challeng...
15/09/2026

A memory popped up on my FB business page, Radiant Retro Rides

I think it's a reminder that, no matter what the challenges may be, for some of us the rewards are so much greater and fostering is just simply part of us. What do others think?

Three years ago I wrote this on that my business page...........

So, something has happened at Radiant Retro Rides HQ. Something that affects the way be offer our services to all you lovely people. πŸšπŸ’š

About two weeks ago I retired from full-time foster care. I planned to only offer respite care to help my colleagues and to spend more time with my grandchildren and attending to our little business. πŸšπŸ’š

I managed one whole week in retirement before becoming officially unretired again! πŸ™ŠπŸ€ͺ

A very special little boy, with a tragic story, but a huge heart, and an infectios smile, captured my attention, stole my heart, and is now residing with me and the dogs at RRR HQ. My children and grandchildren have been extremely understanding and supportive.πŸ˜ŠπŸ’š

I'm sure some of you may have noticed how quiet we've been here of late?! When a new fosterling arrives in our family there are often many meetings, shopping trips, and adjustments to be made all round.

Please be assured that we will continue to offer our services as before but with some minor adjustments.

Wedding transport will continue unchanged.πŸ‘°β€β™‚οΈπŸ‘°β€β™‚οΈπŸ€΅β€β™‚οΈπŸ€΅β€β™‚οΈπŸšπŸ’š

Cream tea, afternoon tea, and photoshoots will be available on Mondays and Saturdays only. πŸ°πŸ§β˜•οΈπŸ“·πŸšπŸ’š

I may not be able to attend as many social or networking events as I had planned.

We hope you, our customers and followers, will understand and support us with these changes. πŸ€žπŸ™πŸΌ

Our mission remains unchanged: to radiate joy to others and help people to create beautiful, lasting memories with Freddie, our iconic VW campervan πŸ˜ŠπŸšπŸ’š

The above is also a reminder that foster carers often balance their caring responsibilities with other roles.

Have a great week lovely people

Pictured is my grandson with me and Freddie the campervan. (Shared with permission) Freddie is an emerald green VW campervan. I am sitting on the side of the campervan wearing a lime green dress, green campervan crocs and a sun hat. My grandson is 6. He is wearing green sunglasses. All the green attire was quite by chance.



With Foster Portsmouth, Fostering South East, Fostering in West Sussex, Brighter Futures for Children, Fair Ways Fostering, TheraParent Fostering, Stronger Futures Portsmouth, Southampton City Council Fostering Service, Fostering Service - Hampshire County Council, Portsmouth City Council, Medway Council Fostering, and Fostering North East

Now that school is back, let's talk about what works for foster family holidays...........Routine, security,  stability,...
09/09/2026

Now that school is back, let's talk about what works for foster family holidays...........

Routine, security, stability, consistency, and predictability.

We take our holidays in the same place each summer and the same week of the school holidays. The children felt safer knowing where we were going. Familiarity, like a home from home, has been a game changercfor smoother transitions for going away each year. Eventually, we'll build to venturing further afield and small changes, very gradual us the way to do it.

Foster family holiday

We escaped to the forest,
me, Bob, and Jo
We resolved to stay patient, just go with the flow
With our children, all six, who are neurodiverse
What could go wrong with this group so diverse

A wonderful lodge, so deep in the woods
For our children we felt that this would be good
Adventure and action at every turn
What more could they want, such opportunities to learn

Archery was a challenge, some gave it a miss
Two of the children were a bit of a risk
We decided another option should be
To avoid a visit to A&E

Too impulsive and quick with their actions and thoughts
Some of the trips made them a bit too fraught
Flitting and darting this way and that
All reasoning lost, along with some hats

Anxiety brings such emotions to bare
The ones children couldn't know were there
Too much to unravel, so tempers were hot
Life is a challenge for this quirksome lot

Friendships were made, then broken apart
Each child reacting with fearsome hearts
One minute besties then staunchest of foes
Keeping us adults hot on our toes

On the ferry they surprised us, they enjoyed this ride
An unexpected journey upon the tide
To get to the island where a castle they'd see
That bit was chaos, overwhelming for me

Sometimes decisions are needed real quick
There's often a moment to cut short a trip
We scurried back to our beautiful lodge
A potential crisis masterfully dodged

Back in the safety of our holiday home
The kettle went on, Jo fancied a scone
So with hunger abaited we formed a new plan
The children played freely while we cooked in the pan

Each meal was consumed with obvious pleasure
But feelings and mood were harder to measure
Socially delayed in so many ways
The children took turns with emotional displays

Sometimes a trigger was easy to see
Others a challenge for both Jo and me
Bedtimes were often a guessing game
Would tonight be intense or incredibly tame

The one thing I know without a doubt
Is that a village is needed to help us out
With my family and friends I'm blessed all round
To have a brilliant team, the best to be found

Ours is a family extended and strong
We stick together when things go wrong
And we share each beautiful memory we make
Adding love and laughter, and quite often cake

We've crafted a method that helps us gel
By knowing each other incredibly well
So we know who is best to take the lead
When another's perspective might fill a need

Our holidays may be much different from yours
But each time we journey and open new doors
We build on the knowledge and passion we share
Just being together offering love and care

By me, Jo Austin

Photos only include my grandchildren (shared with permission). No children that we care for are pictured. What is pictured is our lovely table where meals are shared together. Meal times provide food but are also an important social occasion for our children where learning occurs naturally together.



With Foster Portsmouth, Fostering in West Sussex, Fostering Service - Hampshire County Council, Fair Ways Fostering and Fostering South East

This β¬‡οΈπŸ‘πŸ§‘You have to come to the Portsmouth Youth Awards hosted by URBOND Youth Development Programme and URBOND Communi...
09/09/2026

This β¬‡οΈπŸ‘πŸ§‘

You have to come to the Portsmouth Youth Awards hosted by URBOND Youth Development Programme and URBOND Community to share in our lovely reveal πŸ˜πŸ§‘πŸ–€

22nd September, 5 to 9 pm at the Kings Theatre Southsea. See you there πŸ€žπŸ§‘πŸ–€

It's a free event πŸ‘πŸ˜Š

September is FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder) Awareness Month, and tomorrow, the 9th of September, is FASD Awarene...
08/09/2026

September is FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder) Awareness Month, and tomorrow, the 9th of September, is FASD Awareness Day

My poem below might just give you a glimpse into the lives of children, young people, and adults affected by in utero exposure to alcohol

FASD

Executive function, what could that be?
What does it mean to you and me
Is it a fad, a new found thing
What are the problems that this could bring

When the brain is damaged and wired all wrong
And they just can't learn the words of the song
Grown ups grow weary at the sound of the fight
As they try and hide things with all their might

Masking and fawning, fight or flight
Each child is dealing with a harrowing blight
They didn't ask for this dreadful curse
Or ill equipped adults who make it all worse

Their senses are heightened, on extra alert
Hypervigilant to avoid more hurt
They hide in the shadows the quiet dim light
In case they reveal their inner fright

Bravado and foolishness behind the mask
Hides the truth, they can't manage that task
But they won't let us see that innocent truth
It's just not safe, no trust from these youth

Spatial awareness brings more in its wake
Limited perception is hard to shake
Uncomfortably clumsy in all that they do
They didn't mean to lose that shoe

Impulsive and fearless brings more things to head
They didn't intend to break that bed
But many an incident, often a fall
Too many to mention, so much to it all

Aggression and outbursts can add to the story
There's no winning, no medals, no inner glory
For these children the challenge is real
How can we help them to learn, to feel

With patience and guidance, understanding and care
They can dream of anything if they dare
We can help them understand and see
That the world is still there for those with FASD



With Foster Portsmouth, Fostering South East, Fostering in West Sussex, Stronger Futures Portsmouth, Brighter Futures for Children, Fair Ways Fostering, TheraParent Fostering

Photo is a small girl with red wellies riding a blue and red trike. For safeguarding reasons I've shared a photo of myself, not of any child affected by FASD

When children share a trauma bond, the relationship is often one that brings feelings of safety and security. This is no...
07/09/2026

When children share a trauma bond, the relationship is often one that brings feelings of safety and security. This is not always so, but, where possible, we do our utmost to keep siblings together

There is a great need for foster carers who can welcome sibling groups into their homes. Please consider this if you're thinking of becoming a foster carer

This time last year I wrote this poem about my own sibling

MY SISTER

What is a sister, I hear you say
Well, let me explain in my own unique way
My sister's a person beyond compare
Whenever I need her I know she'll be there

She's more than a sister, she's a best friend to me
The kindest person there could ever be
When I'm sad or afraid, or feeling alone
I reach for my sister, she feels like home

She is my safety, a place to retreat
If life suddenly seems to turn up the heat
She welcomes me home with open arms
I know in her care I'm protected from harm

As children we were known by unusual names
They came by accident, a bit of a game
But life found a way to hold on to those years
When we were affectionately known as Noddy and Big Ears

Now saved for each other as terms of endearment
They were never used with any other intent
But what I will say is, despite how I natter,
As I child I spoke little, but that's another matter

My sister is a person who guides and inspires
With her caring ways and enormous heart
She offers support to any in need
Her life is filled with the kindest of deeds

To family and friends she radiates love
She's a wonderful gift from God above
He sent her to us to love and treasure
My love for her could never be measured

In every moment in each new day
I know she's caring in her own special way
We journeyed together through nursing school
She is more sensible, while I play the fool

But when my humour starts to diminish
She senses a need, she's quick to witness
Knowing me better than I know myself
She suddenly appears like a magical elf

She's a family person, nurturing us all
Sharing celebrations big and small
It's one of the things we most love to do
But at each family party she must have a brew

I'm the luckiest person, that much is true
I have a sibling who's there for me and for you
She'll happily give you her time and attention
She's the best sister ever, did I give that a mention

By Jo Austin for Jan Pattison

Shared with permission

πŸ«‚πŸ˜˜πŸ’œ



With Foster Portsmouth, Fostering South East, Fair Ways Fostering, Brighter Futures for Children, TheraParent Fostering, Southampton City Council Fostering Service, Fostering in West Sussex, Stronger Futures Portsmouth, Fostering Service - Hampshire County Council, and Medway Council Fostering

Photograph is two little girls sharing an outdoor tea party. The girls are sisters. On the left is me, aged 3, on the right is my sister, age 5 πŸ«ΆπŸ’œ

What did you do for your self care today? We did this.......πŸŽˆπŸ‘ŒπŸ’œHot Air Balloon Ride with Atmosphere Balloons 5th Septemb...
05/09/2026

What did you do for your self care today? We did this.......πŸŽˆπŸ‘ŒπŸ’œ

Hot Air Balloon Ride with Atmosphere Balloons 5th September 2026.

Sometimes adulting just has to be fun time making memories together πŸ‘ŒπŸŽˆπŸ’œ because self care is not selfish, it's vital πŸ‘

POEM...........

What a beautiful way to start the day
Though at silly o'clock it didn't seem that way
Until you've flown with Atmosphere Balloons
You won't understand, but you'll want to come again soon

It's hard to put this experience to words
But 'magical' and 'peaceful' were some that I heard
For me it was simply a perfect morning
Taking to the sky as the day was dawning

It was like stepping into another world
We were floating and gliding, though the wind did swirl
We seemed to be weighless as we rose up high
With the sun as a backdrop against a stunning blue sky

With the wonderful landscape far below
Over fields, houses and trees we'd go
We watched as the deer and the cows scurried by
And the hare ran in circles, but no one knew why

When our timeless adventure was nearing it's end
We each gazed upon our family and friends
As our wonderful pilot told us 'no more standing'
We crouched down in the basket ready for landing

It was so serene while we journeyed along
But the the wind picked up, it was rather strong
As we braced ourselves to land in the field
The gusts decided they wouldn't yield

But down to earth with a bit of a bump
And out of the basket we all did jump
To help our hosts make the basket secure
Then they offered champagne, they couldn't have done more

By me, Jo Austin

Thank you so much, Atmosphere Balloons

START OF THE SCHOOL YEAR for neurodiverse and trauma experienced children. 🏫I'm seeing a lot of children and adults stru...
04/09/2026

START OF THE SCHOOL YEAR for neurodiverse and trauma experienced children. 🏫

I'm seeing a lot of children and adults struggling at the moment. Let me explain this new school year phenomenon.

This time of year is super hard for our children. For all children; but even more heightened is the awareness and perception of our children who are neurodiverse or have challenges related to trauma in their lives. 😒

Changes and transitions are often their greatest enemies.

The unknown can be literally terrifying for them. New teacher, new class, maybe even a new school.

There's so much that is unpredictable and many of our children with SEND cannot cope with this.

It's even harder for those children moving on to another school, especiallyto senior school. That's a whole new minefield for them.

Navigating this journey is challenging at the best of times, but it's about all consuming anxiety for many of our traumatised little ones.

It can be equally difficult for the parents and carers who journey alongside them. The anxiety the children feel can often be demonstrated in displays of challenging behaviour. The behaviours are an outward sign of their inner distress.

So, what can we as parents, carers, and teaching staff do to help?

Understanding what is occurring is a big help.

Showing empathy and patience while making appropriate accommodations or adjustments, and personal presence can all go a long way in helping us carry our children through these storms. 🌬

Sometimes, just our consistent presence and BEING alongside a child who is struggling can make a world of difference. Words are not always needed. The presence of a trusted adult is hugely underrated.

Friends, family, or neighbours offering practical help to a parent or carer, in any small way; such as shopping, cooking a meal, or babysitting could be a great gift, too. 😊

And head for the great outdoors!! Harness the power of nature. That should never be underestimated. (And it doesn't cost anythingπŸ˜‰)

Foster Portsmouth, Fostering South East, TheraParent Fostering, Portsmouth City Council, Brighter Futures for Children, Stronger Futures Portsmouth, Fair Ways Fostering, Medway Council Fostering, Southampton City Council Fostering Service, Fostering Service - Hampshire County Council, Fostering North East, Fostering in West Sussex, Fostering North Yorkshire and Foster Wales



Photo is shared with permission. The young girl is neurodiverse and has experienced early life trauma. Her happy place is the beach. The photograph shows her crouched down at the sea's edge. She is exploring the feel of the stones and the water. She is healing πŸŒŠπŸ’œ

My mother wasn't always present, physically or emotionally. My father was the one consistent parent who taught me about ...
02/09/2026

My mother wasn't always present, physically or emotionally. My father was the one consistent parent who taught me about unconditional love.

Some of the children we care for don't have any positive parental relationships. I consider myself blessed to have had one amazing parent.

POEM 53

For my dad. It's his heavenly birthday today.

This was my hardest poem to write. Mostly because even in sad or challenging situations I try to bring my positive vibes along. But, in reality, when you're still deeply grieving, (even 16 years on) that's quite a tall order.

Everybody's journey with grief is different. No matter how long, we still grieve, so we must all respect each person's unique journey. This is part of mine.

I wrote from the heart for my amazing dad πŸ’”πŸŽ‚πŸŒˆπŸ’œ

DAD

When the angels came and called his name
I didn't want to hear
I knew I'd never be the same
My soul was consumed with fear

He taught me so many wonderful things
But one lesson he forgot
Was how on earth I'd live my life
When I was here and he was not

He'd been my best protector
From the moment I was born
Always present, ever strong
I couldn't help but mourn

Despite the storms, the changing seasons
He always loved me, always cared
Just being dad, his only reason
For turning up and being there

Such a brave and kind, true gentleman
Was what his friends would say
His family knew it all too well
He knew no other way

A man who'd offer up his heart
To others when in need
There'd be no hesitation
So many heartfelt deeds

Travelling was his great desire
And Africa set his heart on fire
He loved everything about this place
Though, in his heart, Ghana held top space

As a child, he always held me
Then, as a mother, too
He always had solutions
When I didn't know what to do

He'd been my best supporter
Through each and every stage
The love of a father for his daughter
Never withered, never aged

His passing was the hardest time
I felt it break, this heart of mine
But he handed on his courage and hope
Told me not to sit around and mope

So, I soldiered on and built my life anew
He wouldn't want to see me stew
Now we share his kindness and love
Making him proud as he watches from above

With all my love to my dad

Happy heavenly birthday πŸ’”πŸŽ‚πŸŒˆπŸ’œ

By Jo Austin

PARENT AND CHILD FOSTER CAREWould you consider welcoming a parent and their baby/child to live with you as part of your ...
02/09/2026

PARENT AND CHILD FOSTER CARE

Would you consider welcoming a parent and their baby/child to live with you as part of your family?

I did 😊

Five times 😊

This is a specialist area of fostering:

Parent & Child foster care.

You might like to consider offering your home and your time to help a mother and her baby, or a father and his baby. I have cared for five mothers along with their babies. I enjoyed most of these placements, but they do come with a different set of challenges. It is a very unique experience. Welcoming another adult into the home completely alters your family dynamics. This makes some adjustments necessary.

Some of these mothers had extremely positive outcomes, others not so, and we must be prepared to cope with all scenarios. Some of these placements can be particularly stressful. Some can even be upsetting due to their circumstances. Each mother and baby that I supported taught me more and more about communication and about my own attributes and abilities.

I enjoyed helping mothers who truly wanted support. I loved seeing them turn their lives around and, in turn, helping their babies, too. This is a predominantly teaching and assessment role in specialist foster care with parents joining our families, along with their babies, for approximately 3 months.

A year after leaving our family home, a young mother, who we remained in contact with, invited my adult daughters and I to her wedding. That was a truly special day. Her partner had visited daily while they stayed with us and he was as much a part of our extended family as the mother and baby were.

This is a very rewarding role in modern, therapeutic, foster care.

By Jo Austin, foster carer and Fostering Ambassador with Foster Portsmouth and Fostering South East

If you think a career as a professional foster carer might be for you, please send an enquiry to [email protected] full training and support available

TheraParent Fostering, Fostering North East, Fostering Service - Hampshire County Council, Southampton City Council Fostering Service, Medway Council Fostering, Fair Ways Fostering, Brighter Futures for Children, Stronger Futures Portsmouth, Fostering in West Sussex, Foster Wales, Fostering North Yorkshire



Photo is me with one of my grandchildren (shared with permission)

Two previous award recipients at the Pamodzi Creatives Inspirational Women of Portsmouth awards, and two foster carers f...
01/09/2026

Two previous award recipients at the Pamodzi Creatives Inspirational Women of Portsmouth awards, and two foster carers from Foster Portsmouth had a great day at Parliament

Thank you so much, Stephen Morgan MP, for inviting us for the amazing Democratic Access tour of our UK Parliament last September

Wow!! It was all so beautiful. The House of Commons and the House of Lords were so fascinating and we learned so much.πŸ‘ŒπŸ˜Š Cream tea was pretty good, too πŸ˜πŸ«–β˜•οΈ

Thank you for sharing the day with me, Maggie Bebbington

We made it there and back in one piece, too 😁
(Maybe just one little hiccup with a London bus πŸ€ͺ 🚌)

We have some stunning architecture in the UK β€οΈπŸ€πŸ’™

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Portsmouth
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